Yo what's up! It's your host Selna Kim - America's Face of Dating. Today we're going to be talking about what to do when a girl says she "NEEDS SPACE". We're going to get deep, so, let's dive right in. P.S if you want to see if you would be a solid fit for our program here is my 1-1 direct call link: https://calendly.com/selnakim/30min
MY ANSWERS = (IN BOLD) (Video and Article below)
Emailer: “I’ve been down bad man. I’ve burying myself in work and healing from my past bro.. my gf wants us to have space and time to heal properly because she isn’t emotionally safe right now us is to continue at the moment.. (When a girl says that she “needs space” it’s usually for 1 of 2 reasons man. That is a) there’s definitely another man that she wants to explore with. Or b) she has fallen out of love with you from the way you’ve been acting and treating her in the relationship.) I suppress a lot of my emotions and never open up man. It’s happens in cycles where I hold so much in and explode on her. she wants me to get the help I need and I’m stuck dude.
(I remember a lot of my past relationships I had a lot of trauma and self confidence issues from what I dealt with growing up. I write about some of this in my book, but it was always my goal to be the varsity football starter back in high school. And my coaches recruited two other kids my senior year to take my spot. I worked my ass off for 4 years and I really earned that spot, and they were like: yeah dude you’re going back to the scout team. Literally I was the only senior on that entire team of like 150 guys that played scout team. It was absolutely embarrassing. It shattered my confidence. Up until the point of about 21 years old, I tended to lash out and explode and build things up. And it was because of multiple things. I wasn’t happy with where my life was going. The girl I was dating, I made her believe I was a different man than who I was so I was doing things for the girl I didnt want to do. But what behind anger is always fear. People according to studies have 2 primary fears. The fear that they will never be loved and accepted, and also the fear that they are never good enough. I had a fear of both. When my parent’s divorced and I was outcasted by my entire community, sitting alone at the lunch table and more, it made me fear that I was never going to have love. It put me in a very desperate and scarce place. But when I was told I wasn’t good enough to play varsity, and when my hot ex girlfriend cheated on me I believed it was because I wasn’t good enough. This made me very uncertain of myself when dating.) I plan on marrying her and we’ve been dating for almost 2 years.. she said she loves me and cares about me. She hasn’t removed me from any socials or given back keys to either of our places man.. I feel like I’m pushing her away because I don’t open up. Can you please help.”
(You have to man up and admit that you were acting this way. There are also some things she could also work on in the relationship as well. It’s not always a one way street, relationships go two ways. That comes with communication though. I wouldn’t marry her or think about marriage until you get to a place where you have a direction where your life is going. Me and my girlfriend don’t even talk about that. We don’t bring it up because we want to get to a certain place first. I want to get to certain revenue and team goals with my business and my program. You just can’t have a successful relationship or marriage until you’ve gotten to a place where you are completely confident and comfortable in your own skin. That you are the man kind of man you want to be and you own it. It sounds like you’re sacrificing too much to please this girl, you’re acting like the man you’re not to win her, you’re not being masculine going after what you want. You’re listening to society tell you to treat a girl like this and talk to her like this when you can feel it’s not right. And I’m sure you’re not happy with your current career. How you do anything is how you do everything. If you are waiting until the last moment to explode on your girlfriend what does that say about all of the other things going on in your life outside of dating. That habit is most likely there as well. If you’d like to get my help personally or ask me a question then reach out to me on instagram. Make sure to like and subscribe and comment what you want to hear more about! I’m Selna Kim - America’s Face of Dating and I will see you in the next video.) *** IF you need help fast you can message me on instagram, or talk to me directly 1-1 using this link below to see if you're a great fit for my program: https://calendly.com/selnakim/30min